I had a health scare last week that slapped me, once again, into awareness that I’m alone. I no longer have a husband; I no longer am married. After 56 years, I no longer have someone at home who’s there for me the minute something goes wrong. There have been many challenges as I’ve assumed […]
via Please! No more cancer. Been there, done that. — Write Along with Me
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Your story made me cry – right from the very beginning. It wasn’t even so much the cancer scare part, but more the “being alone” part. I so know that feeling. And it’s a hard one. It’s not like you can just go to Amazon and order a “Not Alone.” I realize you’re also still dealing with grief from the loss of your husband (I’m so sorry), and those are two Very Hard Things to have to deal with at the same time.
I had uterine cancer two years ago – had surgery, radiation and chemo, and there’s been no sign of it since. But the CANCER didn’t bother me as much as the realization that I was ALONE in dealing with it. I’m divorced, gosh, 20 years? Have had two significant relationships since then that are over, and a 27-year old daughter who lives in another part of the country. My parents are long gone, my sister lives 1000 miles away and all my cousins, etc, 3000 miles away. I have some close friends who are about 30 minutes from me. But I don’t have My Own Person, you know what I mean? People can “stop by,” they can “help you out,” or “give you a ride.” But they’re not there with you when you’re home alone when life is just bearing down on you and you just want someone who loves you to hold you and say it’s going to be okay and that they’re there for you no matter what. THAT’S harder than cancer, to me.
I realize I’m fortunate. I survived. And from the moment I heard the words “you have cancer,” I never believed that it was my time – that this cancer at this time was going to be the thing that took me. Others are not that fortunate. But the alone part. That knocked me to my knees. And still does to this day. So I can in some part imagine how it felt to MAYBE be getting a cancer diagnosis…and that you were going to have to deal with it alone. Without your person. So my heart goes out to you. And to me. And to all the many others that are dealing with life’s struggles alone.
And I’m glad your scare turned out to be nothing.
Bettye
God Bless those who share their stories